What to watch in March?

Read a good book.

There are no new episodes of The X-Files currently scheduled for March (though you never can tell -- schedules change). The last show in February, "This is Not Happening" (****) by Chris Carter and Frank Spotnitz, was the first part of the long awaited "Whatever Happened to Fox Mulder?" three-part episode. The current schedule delays parts two and three until April, while in The X-Files time slot, we get the premiere of The Lone Gunmen.

I love The Lone Gunmen as guest stars on The X-Files, but the slapstick and potty jokes in the teasers do not make this spin-off series look very promising. I have nothing against bathroom humor, if it is funny. But the last time I heard a funny potty joke, I was still in high school. (It was about the foo bird, if you must know.) On television today, the mere mention of the fact that people go to the bathroom elicits wild hilarity! "Would you buy that for a quarter?"

Voyager currently has two episodes scheduled for March, "Human Error" by Kenneth Billar and Andre Bormanis early in the month, and the don't-miss "Q2" late in the month. Consult, as they say, your local listings. Or your crystal ball, whichever is more reliable.

Here is a tentative episode guide to the last of Voyager:
Human Error

Q2

Author, Author

Friendship One

Natural Law

Destiny

Renaissance Man

and then the two part series finale, currently scheduled for May.

Star Trek Voyager, "The Void" (***) written by Kenneth Biller, Raf Green, and James Kahn

Another enjoyable episode, it is a remake of one of episodes of the animated Star Trek, but that doesn't count against it. The animated series was real Trek, no matter what Paramount says. It introduced the holodeck, and gave us our first picture of a Salot (designed by Bjo Trimble). In any case, this version has the complex plot we have come to expect from a final-season Voyager. The title tells you the story, but it is very well done, as Janeway tries to uphold Federation ideals in a dog-eat-dog Sargasso of space. I particularly liked the little musical surprise in the final twenty seconds. It is care in the small things that makes great entertainment.