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RESULTS OF F&SF COMPETITION #93

"True Names"


FOR OUR latest competition, writers had to peer into the soul of a work of fiction and divine its true name. They revealed the titles that should have been. Congratulations to the winners, whose crystal balls served them well.

FIRST PRIZE:
Current name: The Fifth Element (1997 film)
True name: Bruce Willis's Last Convincing Toupée Role
—Andrea Kail
New York, New York

 
SECOND PRIZE:
Current name: Startide Rising by David Brin
True name: Dolphins in Spaaaaaaace!
—Mike Brotherton
Laramie, Wyoming

 
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Current name: The Laundry Files by Charles Stross
True name: I've Seen Enough Hentai to Know Where This Is Going
—Geoffrey Hart
Point-Claire, Quebec

 
Current name: Ghostbusters (1984 Film)
True name: A Startup's Practical Guide to Evading EPA Regulations
—Matthew Humphrey
Silver Spring, Maryland

 
Current name: Starship Troopers by Robert A. Heinlein
True name: Raid!™
—Zvi Wities
Givat Shmuel, Israel

 
DISHONORABLE MENTIONS:
Current name: The Magicians (television show)
True name: F**k You, Book Fans
—Andrea Kail
New York, New York

 
Current name: I, Robot by Isaac Asimov
True name: I, Roboticist
—Joel Schlosberg
Oakland Gardens,
New York

 


F&SF COMPETITION #94

 
#EXPLAINAPLOTBADLY

Twitter loves resharing, so we're resharing this competition, found on Twitter: #ExplainaPlotBadly. Take a work of science fiction or fantasy, either in print or on screen, and retell it in a way that makes us laugh. Oh, and because this is a Twitter-based competition, condense it to 140 characters or fewer.
Example:
Hitchhiker's Guide the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
#ExplainaPlotBadly: Arthur Dent leaves Earth, neglects to pack his towel.

First rule of F&SF humor competition: Include your snail mail address. Second rule of F&SF humor competition: Include your snail mail address.

 
RULES:
Send entries to Competition Editor, F&SF, 240 West 73rd St. #1201, New York, NY 10023-2794, or email entries to carol [a-t] cybrid [d-o-t] net. Be sure to include your contact information. Entries must be received by July 15, 2017. Judges are the editors of F&SF, and their decision is final. All entries become the property of F&SF.

 
PRIZES:
First prize will receive a copy of Norse Mythology signed by Neil Gaiman (compliments of W. W. Norton & Co.).
Second prize will receive advance reading copies of three forthcoming novels.
Any Honorable Mentions will receive one-year subscriptions to F&SF.
Results of Competition #94 will appear in the November/December 2017 issue.

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